Mommies Unite!

I've realized that asking for help and understanding that I need help are two entirely different subjects. Admitting that I can't do it all and that my goals are unrealistic is a hard thing to do. Could you blame me for putting the ones I love before me, my health and my sanity? I know that millions of new moms (and old moms) have done so for years. But, as noted in a previous post, I have had an epiphany about it all. Well, at least the part that I needed to accept that I needed help.

Out of the blue I had a friend give my number to a mutual friend that has a baby boy the age of my daughter. I reached out to her because I felt I was in a rut that I needed help out of and quick! You see, it is very easy to lose motivation for the simplest of things when you are a clueless new mommy who is sleep deprived. I mean even stepping outside to throw out the trash was a feat. Being in doors even in perfect 78 degree weather means you are headed in the wrong direction. I had every excuse to not get out and then I looked into her face. She's perfect, innocent, a clean slate if you will. I want  her to have a healthy mommy who's smile reaches her eyes and who has friends and a life.

Long story short, my very good non-mom friend accompanied the new mommies out for a delicious Thai food lunch and a stroll at the mall. Looking back this trip seemed so simple, so mondain even, but it served as therapy. Both of our babies ate and napped and played and cooed, they didn't miss a beat regarding their schedule. I was glad to see my baby so excited to see new people (besides her high strung overtired mommy) for a change and I'm sure the change of scenery was refreshing for her. The therapy session came once we sat and drank our coffee. I couldn't believe how much in common we all had. We laughed, cried and really opened up. We spoke of marriage, our careers, school, our past and present, God, our dreams and worries and even told funny stories. It was great!

If you know me you would know that this is unheard of. I am not an open book, I do not wear my heart on my sleeve and I do not go to the mall to just kill time. In this case I tried something new and it really has changed my life. This all may sound dramatic, and in a way it is, but because this was so foreign to me it really took me out of my comfort zone and helped me realize that surrounding myself with good God fearing women, who are in and out of my situation can and has made me a better mommy and wife.

I feel blessed that I am figuring these things out so early in my daughter's life. I can't imagine not wanting to better myself not only for her but for me and my relationships. I believe that being alive should mean evolving and I now understand that one can't evolve without taking inventory of yourself and then taking action on changing for the better. Even if it means being uncomfortable at first.